text; un: raverobber

[badfeyth]

Good afternoon. It's my understanding that certain efforts are being made around the City with the goal of streamlining and enhancing the "arrival and acclimation" process of welcoming newcomers here. While in full disclosure I'm not directly affiliated with any of these efforts, I have been...retained, I suppose, to assist an interested party with a particular aspect of them.

The aim of this particular initiative is both to provide targeted informative resources to specifically-situated populations that may be among the new arrivals (e.g. directing trolls to nearby shaded areas to prevent any immediate petrification, informing vampires of alternative options to attacking locals for sustenance), as well as to look for ways that the City can be developed to provide those accommodations where possible. Speaking for myself as a squishy and presumably delectable morsel, I for one would certainly be interested in knowing where the Things That Want To Devour Me tend to congregate, so that I can make an informed decision about how consumable I'm feeling that day. (This is a joke. Ha, ha.)

I'm attaching a brief survey so that citizens can volunteer information as they see fit. Please find below a preliminary Q&A:

Q: I DON'T TRUST YOU SO I'M NOT TELLING YOU ANYTHING ABOUT MYSELF!
A: That's sensible of you. Providing response is entirely voluntary and you're under no compulsion to oblige me. However, I can't document information that I don't have, so I'm casting a wide net and will work off of what I receive.

Q: HOW DO I KNOW THIS INFORMATION WON'T BE USED AGAINST ME AND MINE, HUH?
A: Strictly speaking, you don't. Please feel free to submit your answers anonymously, provide only extremely generalized information, deliver them via letters cut out of newspapers glued to a blank sheet of paper wrapped around a brick and thrown through my window — whatever makes you comfortable that it can't be traced back to you, if that's your concern.

Q: I'M GOING TO SUBMIT FALSE ANSWERS AND TAINT THE DATA POOL BECAUSE I AM A SINISTER NE'ER-DO-WELL, MWA HA HA HA HA!
A: I bill by the hour. My life debt will be canceled just as much from spending those hours reading useless information as from reviewing the pertinent variety.

Q: I DON'T UNDERSTAND A SINGLE THING THAT JUST CAME OUT OF YOUR FIGURATIVE MOUTH.
A: I get that a lot. Sorry.

Please see attached and below. Thanks.

<font face="courier new"><b>SURVEY AND DEMOGRAPHIC QUESTIONS:</b> <b>1.</b> Please identify the type of creature or entity the following responses pertain to (e.g. kelpie, incubus, dragon, etc.): <b>2a.</b> Do you want new arrivals to be aware that a creature or entity of your nature is present in the City? <b>2b.</b> If you answered "yes" to the above question, do you want to make resources available for new arrivals to find or connect with you if desired? <b>2c.</b> If you answered "yes" to the above question, please list any resources pertinent to your response (e.g. contact information, directions to customary territory, etc). <b>3a.</b> Are there any advisories or warnings that you want to be made available to new arrivals who may be similarly situated to you? If so, please list them here. <b>3b.</b> Are there any advisories or warnings that you want to be made available to new arrivals who are not similarly situated to you? If so, please list them here. <b>4.</b> On a scale of 1 to 10, with 10 being "extremely accommodated", how well do you feel the City in its present state is equipped to accommodate your unique needs? <b>5.</b> Please identify any concerns you have about the current ability of the City to meet your quality of life needs, as well as any proposed reasonable changes to address those needs.

Comments

text | @stray

[kampfgeist]

so to summarize: please tell us some things about yourself/your species that might help others like you not die if they arrive. optional, not mandatory

basically?



in what currency are you billing us by the hour

[badfeyth]

"Not die" is a fairly low bar to set. I think the envisioned target was more along the lines of "make things easier".

I'm not billing the respondents. I'm billing the client who retained me to perform the work. That's how being paid for services rendered works, generally speaking.

[kampfgeist]

hope for the best but prepare for the worst, as they say


interesting. i billed by the job
different industries i guess

anyway, just making sure you won't be disappointed when you find out there's no money here

i would fill out the survey but it wouldn't be very interesting

[badfeyth]

"Because life is a play, and we're unrehearsed"? I like that one.

And I appreciate your concern, but it's fine. The debt I'm working off wasn't paid in coin.

[kampfgeist]

i haven't heard that second part. i like it though

[badfeyth]

It's got a certain whimsy to it, doesn't it? None of us really knows what we're doing out here, so we're all just doing the best we can along the way.

Billing by the job, I'm assuming you took contracts for something? A skilled tradesman, an adventurer, something like that.

[kampfgeist]

merc work mostly. hard to have an hourly rate for
plus it's not strictly speaking legal and lump sums are harder to trace

do you really normally get paid hourly to ask people about their inhuman traits?

[badfeyth]

Yes, I suppose I wouldn't trust a mercenary to an hourly rate. For one thing, padding the bill would be almost laughably easy. "Whoops, the target narrowly slipped through my fingers yet again! Oh, well, add sixteen hours onto my tally and we'll try again tomorrow."

I normally get paid to facilitate resolutions to difficult problems. I'm something of an all-rounder in that respect. In this case, the problem is finding a means of making supernatural creatures feel more accommodated and welcomed upon their arrival in the City. It's difficult to do that without giving them a chance to express what their needs are to begin with.

[kampfgeist]

exactly. not saying i would have done that [ he really wouldn't have done that! ] but plenty would

huh.

speaking as someone who isn't supernatural but also isn't entirely human: i get the intention
i don't have any particularly unique needs but if i did it would be nice to have info on how to get those met

but depending on the need i can see why you'd be reluctant to self-report
like: "i'm a zombie and i eat human brains to survive"
well now some folks who are human and have brains might be a little freaked out about being dinner

anyway, guess i'm saying you might want to consider a resource hub without names attached
reduces the likelihood that somebody decides to take it out on any individual

or if you need a human-looking go-between who's stronger than your average bear
good news, you now know one

@anon

[anthropophagite]

I'm sorry, but I think this will just end up putting a lot of people in danger.

[badfeyth]

Well, it's voluntary self-reporting, so I would assume that people would consider carefully the type of information they were releasing before they gave it up. It's not as though I can compel a response.

Presumably, the people who respond will be the ones who don't feel that they'll be in danger by it. If you feel otherwise, then I'd be the first to encourage you to refrain.

[anthropophagite]

People might share hoping for good intentions, but unfortunately, fear may cause a different reaction. Especially if it's told to those who have just arrived.

[badfeyth]

So your concern is that a new arrival will see this information, become frightened, and take it out on the citizens who shared that information in good faith?

I'm not challenging the perspective, I'm just making sure I understand it.

[anthropophagite]

[ and start a hunt after the non-humans of this place. Yes ]

Sometimes, people do bad things when they are afraid.

[badfeyth]

I'm going to take that as a yes.

By the same logic, would it also be fair to say that a supernatural creature who arrived here might themselves be afraid, concerned about how they're going to both meet their unique needs but hide what they are from a population they know nothing about and who might very well decide to have that fear reaction about them — but then see that there are available resources that at best acknowledge and welcome them, and at worst give them information they can use to discreetly survive while continuing to mask what they are, and feel reassured by it?

...

My apologies. I sometimes get wordy when I'm thinking through a point. The short version is, is it fair to say there are also possible outcomes where this initiative might alleviate fear instead of instigating it?

[anthropophagite]

I mean no offence, I understand what you are trying to say.
But most of us know how to do that on our own. And have been doing that since we arrived here. We have learned to survive and hide even before we came to this place.

[badfeyth]

It's interesting you bring that up, because the client who asked me to do this is also someone who was forced to do that on their own upon their arrival here.

They wanted this because they were of the opinion that just because people like them CAN do it on their own doesn't mean they should have to.

[anthropophagite]

[ a vampire, perhaps? kaneki has met one who was very quick to admit to what he was ]

There is a reason why we often have to rely on ourselves.

Most of the time, we are not welcomed. And in a place like this, where we are all trapped, the last thing someone wants is to be trapped with something they see as a monster.

[ nobody wants to be trapped with a hungry cannibal. ]

text; @InspectorConstable

[cupperty]

Is it customary to sign off with 'MWA HA HA HA HA!' when you're a sinister ne'er do well who doesn't have good intentions?

[badfeyth]

It's a fairly common attribute of the sort, in my experience. Tends to go hand-in-hand with mustache-twirling.

[cupperty]

Mustaches too? I imagine they'd have to be quite big in order to twirl properly.

[badfeyth]

Oh, yes. Extremely long and curled at the ends. Waxed into points, often, as well. Easier to get a finger around them for twirling, that way.

[cupperty]

Oh, that's very distinctive! It must make ne'er do wells easy to recognise!

[badfeyth]

It's one reliable method, at least. Another is, of course, taking stock of all the "well" they're "ne'er do"ing.

In the market for recognizing that sort, are you?

[cupperty]

Not really, but it seems a useful skill to have!