video ; @Kromer

[gripper]

( kromer, famously, almost never uses the video function—it's a taboo in n corp to take pictures, record film, things like that, and she's spent enough time there that it feels almost criminal to do so. she does it only for very specific reasons: to make sure people know she's not paying attention to them, or...

well, today it's because she's making cookies! welcome to Cooking with Kromer. the kitchen is well-lit, her ingredients are out, everything in its place... )

Good afternoon, City folk. For those who know me, how're we doing? For those who don't, I'm Kromer. Pleasure.

( ...haha. )

Anyway, first you're gonna wanna make sure your butter's nice and soft... Room temperature's best, but you just don't want it cold. It won't cream as well that way! Now... ( she doesn't want her voice drowned out by a fucking MIXER so she's creaming it the old fashioned way, thanks— ) I didn't start this up just to show off my baking skills. Actually, I had some pretty important stuff to say!

( add vanilla and the powdered sugar... work that in... )

So recently... You could say I've been causing a little bit of trouble. Sort of testing the waters, seeing how much you could actually pull here before whoever's in charge of our iteration got tired of it.

( once that's come together, flour... )

I found it, and let me tell you... You don't really wanna cross that threshold. They'll kidnap you to some crummy facility—by the way, totally empty. Looked kind of like a hospital, but all the rooms were locked... You know how it goes with locked doors around here, right? I wasn't gonna try 'em—anyway, they had some of those rooms I woke up in, they had some sleep monitoring ones, things like that.

( dump out the dough onto a floured surface. shape it into a rectangle, and wrap it in plastic. kromer smacks it a few times with her hand, looking pleased. )

I'm not really keen on talking about what went on, but I can say... Did anyone else read those papers about Pavlov or whatever? They're using that guy's thing with the dogs.

( ................

she retrieves some already made dough from her fridge. she is deadset on her fucking cookie-making right now. )

Just wanted to let everyone know not to cause too much trouble, alright? Let's really get along, make friends, and do our best to make a community we can alllll be proud of.

( she doesn't sound all that enthused, though. )

Oh, and if anyone has any shortbread shape ideas... I'll take 'em. Nothing childish, okay? I'm not making a bunch of dicks.

Comments

[fussiest]

[ there's a moment wherein kaveh is back in that moment. netzach's pulse had been jack-rabbit quick in the palm of his hand. it had never been so weak as it had been in that moment. kaveh had grasped for it, and had feared that it would slip free. his blood had been warm, and had stained kaveh's hands. it had taken a long time to wash it out.

kaveh throws up his hands, then his legs. he arranges himself horizontally on the couch, and tips back his head with the kind of sigh that could once have resounded across the world - derisive and weary all at once. ]

I know, I know! But I wasn't going to not chase her, Alhaitham. I had to hear it from her mouth why she thought she had to do what she did. I had to get a good hit in or I could not look at Netzach again in the eyes. Don't tell me you didn't want one either.

[justscribing]

[Alhaitham hums in response. He can't deny the satisfaction of getting to give Kromer a good whack even if it did result in an awkward handcuffing situation. However, he can also realize it wasn't the optimal way of handling the situation.

He looks down at his phone, the back up at Kaveh.] I'm going to respond.

[fussiest]

[ kaveh groans. ]

Of course you are. Of course. Look- I'd tell you not to say anything provocative, but given that it's you, everything that comes out of your mouth is a provocation. So just, [ kaveh flicks his fingers, dismay and exasperation apparent, ] don't say anything I wouldn't, alright?

[justscribing]

[Typing this out...] I say things you wouldn't all the time. Why would I start holding myself to that standard now?

[fussiest]

Because it would be prudent if you did! Not that you'd recognise the word, I'm sure that one was mysteriously missing from all twenty of the languages you studied to earn your degree. [ kaveh pulls up his device. he looks, squinting: ] ... wait, did you just imply she had a terrible personality?

[justscribing]

Wouldn't most people consider a violent disposition to be a terrible personality? I want to know how deep their conditioning goes.

[fussiest]

I'm glad that you realise you've also a terrible personality. [ but there's no heat in the way kaveh rolls his eyes, equally annoyed and fond both - ] Fine. Ask your questions. I suppose it's your turn to pick a fight sometime anyway.