video | un: NAILS

[nichocolatine]

[ good morning city-folk, how's your day? today's broadcast is brought to you by our sponsors Fuck This Place, in partnership with Fuck Heine Especially. the video begins after the phone's owner sets it on the ground, so the camera angle is a little strange, but he never claimed to be some marvel of photography here so you get what you get okay.

badou also plunks himself on the ground in what appears to be the sidewalk in front of some nondescript convenience store. the shelves of which he'd just raided if the plastic bag he sets down beside him is of any indication. within its contents one can find a bright pink energy drink, a generous helping of cigarette cartons, and what appears to be a family-size bag of off-brand twizzlers. #bachelorlife, amirite?

there's bruising on his neck that's only just begun to fade, and a splint around his left wrist that's already got various crude drawings on it, all courtesy of mr. artist himself. he works on fishing himself out and lighting up a brand new cigarette before even addressing the camera (made all the more difficult by that fractured wrist) so enjoy five minutes of nicotine addict ASMR. ]

Hey. 'Sup. How ya doing. Have y'all seen my dog? Lost him a bit ago, about yea high, real pale, red eyes, no eyebrows, answers to the name Heine or Fuckface.

[ for ease, he's provided a supplementary visual, which he holds up to the camera with all the flourish of a child's first finger-painting. BEHOLD his uncanny portrait! yes, his commissions are open. ]


[ he crumples the paper with perhaps a lot more ire for someone supposedly "missing" his ""dog"" but a deep drag of his cigarette quickly calms him back down. there's a beat-up lighter in his hand he can't seem to stop fiddling with. ]

Thought about putting some signs up and slappin' 'em on some milk cartons but who knows what the fuck whoever's-in-charge-here considers """vandalism""" and I ain't about to go around testin' it like some of you can't seem to stop yourselves from.

[ a-hem. ]

Speakin' of — that survey we were given here. How many of ya answered that honestly? Shit's startin' to get real personal, though I think I'd remember if I'd been asked about the worst fuckin' day of my life.

[ which begs the question he's sure everyone's already thought about by now: how the fuck do these people know them that well? ]

---

( EDITED: because someone (me) forgot to include injuries.... smh )

Comments

[icanfixer]

[ it's what she's good for!!! ]

Thee and I both know this city's quietness is a different sort, I believe. One less in silence and more in complacency. I do not care for it, truthfully -- but it is better than villains running amok, I suppose.

[nichocolatine]

Is it? I don't mind villains runnin'... makes it easier to know what to shoot at.

[ a pause. ]

Metaphorically, anyway.

[ he misses you, guns 😢 ]

[icanfixer]

One should wish for an ideal world where there is no need to hurt others, where anyone can be whom they wish without treading on those beneath nor being tread upon by those above, where villainy is dismissed and those who have aided in justice's crusade will be thusly rewarded in a time of peace... But this city is off putting.

[ she misses!!!! fighting!!!! anyway it feels a crime to say such as an agent of justice so-- ]

Do thee shoot things literally as well? Ranged weaponry is... not banned, but restricted whence I hail. One must pay a grand price for it, so I am curious to know.

[nichocolatine]

Dunno if such a place exists, Don. But it's nice to think about.

[ sort of. badou thinks even if he were plopped into such a place next, he'd still feel too paranoid not to think something else wasn't simmering under the surface. ]

But yeah, I know my way around a gun. I'd prefer ranged fighting — makes it easier to run away if I have to.

[ sorry he's a 🎵 coward 🎵 ]

Why's it restricted for ya?

[icanfixer]

Oh, because the Head says it is.

[ ... simple as that. cowardice is fine, in some sense, but to her that just means he protects the backs of others. ]

[nichocolatine]

Uh huh, uh huh, gotcha.










Who?

[icanfixer]

The Head! They are the ones whom, above all, seek to ensure to the safety, happiness, and so on of the people in the City. Whilst they are not the most powerful in a fighting sense, they are strong in other ways.

[ given they're the ruling... one of the ruling governments in the city. ]

The laws which we live under are decided and enforced by those of the Head, detailing down the the sort of weapons we are able to possess. It is very expensive, I have heard, to even make bullets, so most prefer close combat.

[nichocolatine]

[ bureaucracy ain't shit, don!! ]

Ah, yeah, anything that's gonna help you keep livin' ain't gonna be cheap.

[ ammo is expensive back in his city too. that's why many resort to less than... legal ways to acquire them. :') ]

So what do you fight with?

[icanfixer]

[ bureaucracy is the backbone of the city they have a label and value for everything its insane. also totally normal wdym people's lives shouldn't be marked like they're butterflies on a pinboard ]

A lance!

[ ... like the medieval sort? ]

[nichocolatine]

[ that... both makes a lot of sense but also not. once again badou is left wondering if this is a don's-world-thing or a don-thing. ]

Right, right, you were makin' Heine your squire and everythin'... [ obviously lances lead to squireship, easy. ] Must be pretty easy to fashion somethin' here to work just as well, huh? [ like.... a pole. ]

[icanfixer]

Nay, it is not. The lance I prefer is one alike to the fabled unicorn's horn, and twice my size. It is difficult to do much else but straightened lines here.

[ and she needs it chunky!!! skewerable!!!! ]

[nichocolatine]

You know what'd happen if someone were to try and make a weapon anyway? Maybe not exactly like you once had, but you know... Somethin' close enough.

[ there is a pause. ]

And if you don't, don't go testin' it.

[ don!! ]

1/2

[icanfixer]

[ ....... ]

2/2

[icanfixer]

One can use anything as a weapon, so I do not think, um, perhaps one would be punished for making... a practical art piece.





[ the one being. i mean. she's not looking at him. ]

[nichocolatine]

[ don!! ]

Stop. Stop thinkin', I can see them wheels turnin' in your head.

[icanfixer]

[ UGHHH she doesn't want to lie!!!!!!!





she made one but it was for her good friend it hasn't been used (probably) but what if it gets taken away mysteriously by the city!!!!!! whats the problem of having a halberd twice her size sitting in her apartment if it's basically a security blanket!!!! ]

... It is... rather labor intensive to do such things too often, Ser Badou, so thee needn't worry.




[ and the people she wants to make them for are like, well-trained individuals who won't just swing at anything. but maybe. she will be a little careful. from now on. since she did not think there could be consequences. ]

[nichocolatine]

[ badou's ability to read between the lines is more often a curse than a blessing. ]

You did it already didn't you. And it don't sound like you plan on stoppin'!

[icanfixer]

[ she likes heine's more why can't you be like him and also say things in a somewhat cryptic manner where she also gets to read between lines!!!!!! ]

I have done so once! For a friend dear to me, whom I owe much comfort! Um, the others whom I wish to arm are my fellows in job title, who I know I can entrust them.

[ well she has a deep admiration for gebura so that's why it'd just be weird if she got her something and then roland nothing. ]

But I wish them to be better done, not ill-fit as my first creation, and I would like to improve upon that one as well, for he is much in my thoughts as any other, but I haven't the experience nor the advancements the Workshops back home herald so proudly!!!

[nichocolatine]

[ sorry he's not more like your boyfriend don goshhh ]

Intention and trust don't mean shit. You said it yourself before, didn't you?

[ murder is murder, weapons are weapons. ]

Look, you're grown, I ain't gonna tell you what to do, but maybe remember the last time you thought to break the rules around here and how you weren't the only one affected by it.

[icanfixer]

[ oh my goooodddddd shut uuuup

he is right though, and don hates to be scolded. especially when she feels she's done nothing wrong. murder is murder, weapons are weapons. observing is nonaction, punishable just the same. ]

... I made it for him prior to that, so it is as it is. However, I shall warn him against its usage just in case.

[ even if

it kinda sucks that her good will goes out the window with it. but he'd been grateful just for the thought, so maybe that's all that matters in the end. ]

[nichocolatine]

[ at least badou isn't the type to harp on a point well made (unless you're heine or he's extra peckish) so he's more than happy to move on. ]

Y'know, I hear flowers and chocolates are still in fashion.

[ does it stop him from teasing, though? no, never. ]

[icanfixer]

[ by the wings this can't be happening to her ]

... I suppose a bit of green would not hurt the apartment... and sweets are something we both like...

[ but her weapons ): ]

[nichocolatine]

[ don't ruin his joke by being purposefully obtuse!! ]

Yeah, there ya go. Always a good idea to start with somethin' you have in common.

[icanfixer]

[ she is not romancing her partner!!!!!!! more than she accidentally does!!!!!! ]

We have a strong friendship already, so there is no need for me to treat it as something in need of bolstering. It is merely nice to do things for those one cares for -- a sentiment thee should try out sometime.

[ so treat your dog better ]

[nichocolatine]

What, you callin' me a bad owner?

[ he leans back on his palm, idly rolling the half-finished cigarette between the thumb and forefinger of his other hand. ]

You don't know our business, pixie. So don't get too fresh, huh?