video ; @thundaga

[astraphilia]

[ hello and welcome to Boredom Hours, sponsored by one too many midafternoon beers and a perpetual inability to not immediately make his ennui everyone else's problem. today's host is... Reno!

when the video starts, it's to a shockingly decently framed shot of Reno doing the hooligan squat on the front stoop of his apartment building. he's got a lit cigarette hanging from his mouth, and once he's sure that the video is rolling he takes a long drag of it before he speaks. ]

Sup. I'm Reno. Some of ya may know me from my colorful past as "guy who got yanked into pool by tentacle monster."

[ probably nobody knows him that way but it's fine. we are not concerned with strict veracity here. Reno blows a neat smoke ring and grins the kind of grin that means he knows he's being a pain in the ass. ]

I was thinkin', y'know, there's only so many of us. Probably ain't a bad idea to get to know each other, right? [ he gestures with his cigarette as he speaks as if to underscore his words. ] We need some conversation starters. Some icebreakers, y'know? Everybody's favorite highlight from their corporate bonding retreats.

So! [ he holds up a hand to count on.

one finger. ] Two truths and a lie. Post 'em, let other people guess. I'll leave mine too. Shoutout to the blond girlie who had that party a couple months back for this one.

[ two fingers. ] Hot or not. Or smash or pass, whatever you wanna call it. Post yourself and let people vote, if you're brave. Or post your friends if you want to fuck around. You can all see my face right now so count that as my submission.

[ three fingers. ] Creativity exercise, open prompt. You can go anywhere, be anybody, do anything you want. The world ain't ending and there's no war or whatever the hell going on. Who are you and what are you doing? [ brief smoke break, and then Reno stubs the butt out on the cement, exhaling as he says, ] Me, I wanna make mediocre coffee for minimum wage and not worry about shit except makin' rent.

[ and lastly, four fingers. ] "Reno, this is fuckin' stupid and I don't want to do it." Okay, nobody's got a gun to your head. We ain't even got guns here. Do what you want.

[ his four fingers curl in so he can offer a cheerful, if a bit manic, thumbs-up before he reaches out to turn off the video.

just before he touches the button, though, he pauses as if something just occurred to him— ] Oh, shit—also, drop map pins for your favorite restaurant in this place. I'm in the market for new eats, bonus points if it's spicy.

[ okay, now he's gone. ]

Comments

[onlythans]

[Well, now that "Hythlodaeus" has also shown up, he's kind of squinting at this a little bit more than he might've otherwise. Speaking as someone who once stole Y'shtola's device and impersonated her on the network for the hell of it, it's not exactly outside his wheelhouse to consider.]

Really. No cutting remark? No thinly-veiled allusions to my mediocrity or ignorance?

[nomoresharks]

I happen to be feeling charitable today. Though if you would *prefer* I make a mockery of a man I barely know, you're free to make suggestions on where I am to begin.

That said, 'tis curious you ask this of me when you yourself *just* accused *me* of being a masochist. Have you any other proclivities you'd like to disclose?

[He feels a little bad for this, since he does like Thancred, but between being called out on his impression and Emet-Selch himself upping the stakes, it's time for him to actually try.]

[onlythans]

The only time you'd take a "suggestion" from someone like me is if you couldn't be arsed to come up with anything yourself.

I can't picture you with a greatsword, by the by.

[nomoresharks]

Then your imagination is more limited than I thought. 'Tis not a common choice, but if needs must I am more than capable of using one in tandem with protective magicks. Curious that you yourself have never claimed to see it, given all you claim to know.

[onlythans]

[He's got about ten more seconds before tabbing between Hyth's reaction to his thirst trap and this conversation from "Emet-Selch" has him noticing Hyth's rather distinctive way of adding emphasis to words. Not quite yet, but soon enough.]

Do you think so? I don't find it particularly strange, really.

A greatsword is for protecting others. Mayhap I was simply never in a context where you would have had reason to.

[nomoresharks]

[Hythlodaeus try not to praise people you like challenge: impossible]

How very astute of you. Unlike some people, I try not to make a habit of intruding in on others' problems. That you're still alive either proves my involvement was unnecessary, or my notice wasn't the only one you were beneath.

In any case, having skimmed this "icebreaking" exercise, I cannot help but notice you didn't bother with the first prompt. Regardless of what you may or may not have to hide, *I* have a competition to win. So if you would be so kind as to proffer two truths and a lie, we can move on from this conversation.

1/2

[onlythans]

[ > I try not to make a habit of intruding in on others' problems

> I try not to make a habit of intruding in on others' problems

> I try not to make a habit of intruding in on others' problems ]

[onlythans]

[sir thancred has lived through shadowbringers, the expansion lovingly subtitled "emet-selch makes a habit of intruding in on others' problems"

sometimes with a gun]

Very well. Afford me but a moment and I'll see if I can't come up with something.

[nomoresharks]

[Shadowbringers, AKA: Emet-Selch makes himself everyone's problem.]

Thank you for your cooperation. I shall attend your response anon.

[Regardless if he wins or loses this point, it should prove enlightening!]