citynet | text, un: gautier, cw: some references to alcohol use and sexual content

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text, un: gautier, cw: some references to alcohol use and sexual content

[Specifics tbd, but there's a drunk Midnight involved ~~and he doesn't have a shirt and might've lost his pants.~~ he's fucking naked.

But for now.]

a guy lost his clothes to the washer. anybody saw a pink shirt?

[Attached is a picture of Midnight. I have no fanart, so you must imagine this guy: no shirt, Jojo-posing, wearing a pink feathery thing, drunk, fly open.]

and here's the guy who lost his stuff

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[ Oof. Midnight hisses as soon as his delayed senses inform him that his titties are in ice hell, then accepts the bottle with both hands, unconsciously opening it and taking a sip. ]

Shirt is gone. I mean, I'm not certain about that, but I trust Sylvain implicitly. Have you met him? He's right there.

[ He points at Sylvain, his newest friend, as though Gregor hasn't seen him yet.

Wait, keep drinking! Good ideas from good friends. He continues to sip, humming happily. It's so nice to be with people. ]

[Sylvain gets a wink and a quick little salute. All good, baby boy. You're doing amazing.]

Gotta take care of all the troops, right? But damn, that sucks to hear about the shirt. Seems like folks were getting themselves in a tizzy over it online. Don't want 'em to get the wrong impression just because a shirt slipped away into the void...

[Like, there's being a flirt, and there's being an actual sex pest one should feel unsafe around. He thinks? The closest he's ever come to that is the one guy who asked him a little too intensely about his arm, and he got the bad vibes. Anyway!]

--and yeah, I've met him. He's a good kid, right? Better than I was at his age, that's for sure. [joke's on Gregor they are BOTH child soldiers! Har har!] You guys are pretty chummy already then, I take it?

[So, here he is. Sitting around. Minding his own business. Drinking the water. Relaxing a little. At long last, he's not alone; at long last, he's got someone who can help him drag Midnight to a bed.

And then Gregor says he's a good kid and Sylvain chokes on his water, he fucking chokes on it, he gestures that he's okay if either of them look at him while thumping his chest a little because Saints, he was not prepared for that.]

I'm fine.

[See, he's fine. Wheeze! Breaths. Words?]

I guess? [They just met. Are they? What? Good kid? The existential crisis continues.]

It's quite all right. I understand that some may just not be ready for me...

[ Midnight understands the difference between a sex pest and what he does well enough. He is happy to stay drunk and in his own lane!

He's about to agree and inform Gregor that although he doesn't know if the sentiment is returned, he likes Sylvain very much, but he does notice Sylvain accidentally waterboarding himself before he gets a chance to open his mouth. Hey, it's loud, and Midnight's drunk, not dead. ]

Sylvain, love, you all right?

[ He makes his way over with a much more steady pace than someone as intoxicated as he is really has a right to, peering at Sylvain with great concern. He holds out his own water. (Sylvain has a water. Okay, please, this drunk man wants to be helpful.) ]

Oh-- hey, uh. [He's beat on the punch to checking if Sylvain's okay, but Gregor's still going to swoop in and offer two (2) solid, masculine thumps between the shoulder blades for all that effort. Cough it up, spud.]

Sorry if I embarrassed you, heh. More friends is a good thing here, let's be real; doesn't matter if they're old or new, right?

[Sylvain also gets a gentle hair ruffle, because we are all just touching each other's hair in this laundromat tonight, nature is healing.] And I'm sure Midnight's going to be fine; a little accidental nipple showing online is better than, uh.

Some of the stuff some folks [himself included] have gotten up to on the internet lately!

[Cough, cough, he's fine, he waves it off, it's okay, he can breathe.

Inhale.

Exhale.]

I'm fine, I get it, we gotta look out for each other. And you're...uh, definitely right about that.

[There's no good way of admitting that after he saw the casual murder mention on the network he inhaled, exhaled slowly, and tried (and failed) to find something sturdy like an axe to carry around, so that if anyone went after Dimitri he could fucking chop off their head before they could lay a finger on his prince. Because a knight's gotta do what a knight's gotta do.

So, in lieu of that, Sylvain chuckles! A slightly uneasy laugh, but he tries. It's a big night full of emotions.]

Probably half the reason why people got worked up over Midnight's nipples; it's something to look at that's not, uh. That.

[ Why is everyone talking about his nipples? Midnight... all right, he pulls the collar of his godawful tunic and peeks down at his own chest. Not that he doesn't have some excellent boobs, but the nips are the most ordinary part of them.

... He stays like that for a moment. Okay, look, he is really into his pecs. He worked hard on them. He's very proud of them. ]

Should I post more shirtless pictures of myself, then? I don't mind.

[ Midnight just, you know, heroically providing the network thirst trap pics to drown out the doomposting. He will do this. He is a generous soul. ]

True. The dying thing spooked a lot of folks, right when we'd gotten into a sense of normalcy. I don't blame anyone for wanting to get upset about something mund--

[what]

Absolutely not!

You'll have people thinking you're a creep if you actually keep doing that! Don't go ruining your reputation already, man!

[LISTEN, BROTHER. Time to pinch Midnight's cheek, since Sylvain is Not Dying and Alright, Probably. STOP THIS. HE'S GOT ENOUGH TO WORRY ABOUT AS IS?] Once was for identification, but twice? Twice is going to be harder to smooth over!

[This could've been him. This really could've been him. This still could be him. Is this him? This might be him. Much to think about, much, much later.

For now, they have a situation. Sylvain takes a drink, swallows, washes the taste of sincerity from his mouth. It's okay. He can handle this.]

And if you're thinking 'it's my chest; what's so bad about that?' consider this: if you constantly post shirtless pictures, over and over, people will get used to it. They'll say, "That's Midnight's chest. He posts it weekly." Nobody wants to be a regularly scheduled event that everyone comes to expect and nobody cares about.

If you want to have the maximum impact, you'll need to at least space it out. A lot.

[See? Strategy.]

[ Midnight, once again, is a bit numb to the world, but that pinch does make it through the intoxication wall eventually. ]

Ah — ow. Well, if everyone needs a distraction...

[ But it is, once again, Sylvain to the rescue. Midnight, whether Gregor lets go of his beautiful, beautiful face or not, nods solemnly. ]

Although I feel as thought the appeals of my body are evergreen... You're quite right. Even the most sweeping of mountain vistas become commonplace through... through habit? No, through constancy. Thank you.

Gotta be more subtle about it too, or the girls are going to just roll their eyes even if it's only done once in a blue moon.

[Said like he knows shit! He doesn't! Who would believe him! But he lets go of Midnight's face all the same, punctuating it with a placating pat.]

Honestly, I can probably only think of one woman I work with who'd be into you, and [it's the woman he has a thing for so fuck you fuck you fuck you] even she'd get tired of evergreen mountain vistas after short time, I think. And she's from a cold part of the City! It's about absence making the heart grow fonder, and pseudo-rarity.

That's how they drive up demand for goods, anyway. If it feels rare, you feel special for seeing it or having it!

-you sound like you've got a lot of experience with this sort of thing.

[HE ABSOLUTELY DOES NOT, but you know what? You know what?]

Got more advice you can share with the two of us?

[Please, share with the class.]

[ ... So. On one hand. Midnight literally made a living charming women. (And men. And... okay, a lot of people gave him money to be listened to. He used to be filthy fucking rich and that is why.) He is more than capable of giving this lecture. Several times over.

On the other hand. He's so drunk, guys. And open minded. He loves to learn. He always assume every new person he meets has something different and wonderful to teach him. (See again: Big ol' slut for listening.)

So all he does is find a nearby washing machine, plonk his ass down, and continue to sip at his water. Sweet, sweet water. Zoned out. Zoned in. Like, not focused, because the alcohol he has imbibed has temporarily deleted that capability from his DNA, but he's present. Ish.

Go on, Gregor. Please. Midnight is enthralled. He has completely bought in. Whisk him away. ]

[Anyway. Ah. Actually having to think of himself as having any sort of game is wild, and he instantly turns red, right to the tips of his ears. His mouth opens and closes uselessly for a good few seconds, until he grunts dismissively and starts patting himself down for a cigarette. Sorry bread, you are discarded onto a washing machine, right beside Midnight because bro please eat.

And for Sylvain's trouble, he receives a glower.]

I mean, it just seems like common sense, that part. Experience doesn't even come into it. There's, uh...Nothing more to it.

'Least not what I can provide.

Well, I guess we're not getting anything else out of our professor over here and need to figure things out for ourselves, huh, Midnight?

[It should be noted how this is said, with a tone of absolute faked sincerity, earnestness and a little bit of disappointment tinging Sylvain's voice, though if Gregor looks at him he raises his eyebrows in a faked 'who me' moment. And grins. It's a shit-eating grin. Yeah, he knows what he's doing. Yes, he's taking advantage of a drunk guy.

But it's for a good cause.]

[ Midnight is too drunk to figure out what the good cause is! I can't figure it out either, but I'm not drunk, I'm just stupid.

But Midnight sighs, his disappointment absolutely genuine. ]

Well, from a dearth of resources comes Mother invention... Something. [ He hiccups. ] I think I'll just keep doing what I want. Works, usually.

[ Why hasn't Sylvain knocked him out with a lamp yet? It's a real question, here.

Of note: Midnight is still happily sipping at his water, but the bread hasn't been touched. It's still in its packaging and all. ]

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text, un: gautier, cw: some references to alcohol use and sexual content

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Absolutely not!

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