@junpei | text

[coolerjunpei]

[Now, Junpei is fairly certain they're all here for some kind of fucked up death game, because why wouldn't the third time be the charm!!— but until some mysterious costumed weirdo starts getting on all the screens and making announcements, there's not that much to go on. He can skulk around town glowering suspiciously at things for long so long.

Sooooo.]

if anybody wants my vote, it's t minus however the hell long before we all start killing each other. would love to be wrong, but if i live long enough to say i told you so, yknow. yippee.

so.

why do *you* think we're here? wrong answers only. top 3 by popular vote get a prize.

[Does he have a prize to hand out... No, no he does not. He will find some cheap garbage in one of the shops and write a 1ST/2ND/3RD PLACE on it, no problem. Eventually. Maybe even a sticker.]

and what do you guys think about picking code names? you know, just in case.

[big talk from username junpei]

Comments

text post; un: peerless_cucumber

[xiaoxiuya]

Well, somebody's determined to be a Debbie Downer. Why are you so convinced we're going to start killing each other, hm? Not out of a personal desire on your part, I hope.

[coolerjunpei]

that's me. debbie downer's not a bad code name in a pinch.

why are you convinced we're not? i'm taking suggestions for, like, becky positive thinking.

text | un: ouroborosed

[inlovewithmycar]

Oh come on, you lot haven't even got weapons yet. It's a bit too early for that sort of thing don't you think? At least wait until someone cobbles together a makeshift crossbow or something.

But code names sound good. Like spies, right?

[coolerjunpei]

you could probably get somebody good with the right silverware, i dunno. it's a miracle the fortune teller thing didn't kill anybody if you ask me.

and yes just like spies, you in?

text; un: UEHARA

[metafictions]

Oh. I didn't think about code names. Is it too late to change my username?

[Not that he's creative enough to make up a code name.....]

Anyway, while I hope we aren't here to kill each other, whoever brought us here almost certainly didn't so out of the kindness of their heart. Everything is so suspicious.

[coolerjunpei]

username? oh shit. nobody read the usernames. there's probably still time...

[There's no hope for them...]

you're right though. what happened to whoever was here before? maybe it was us and we don't remember.

text, un: gautier

[laidtocrest]

[There's going to be a support group of people who filled the survey in with some form of their real name before realizing the possibilities, but, unlike someone, Sylvain has the excuse of struggling with technology. But it's definitely for the best.

Speaking of struggling, there's a lot to unpack here. Starting from the top.]

why code names?

[coolerjunpei]

in case our real identities are part of why we're here. and it'd be easier to keep what we're doing from the bastard in charge with code names... i think.

text; un: yomiko

[blackwaterchild]

We're here for a flash mob. Obviously.

[coolerjunpei]

finally someone answers the right way.

it's gonna suck. what's the song?

text | un: moment

[elswhisperer]

We won't get anywhere by turning on each other.

[ It's crossed his mind that someone among us amongst the apparent captives could be playing innocent, but Setsuna feels being overly suspicious will only end badly. ]

Seeing if we do is a possible motivation for taking us here.

[ That had not crossed his mind until Junpei said it. As a theory, it makes a concerning amount of sense. ]

[coolerjunpei]

of course we won't. i'm just saying, as soon as somebody comes on the air to tell us that if x people die, the rest of us get to go home, i'm sleeping with 1 eye open.

[Junpei lives to be overly suspicious, or at least he does these days. He's been out of the last super complex death game for a total of a single day; the frustration comes out like this, in bitter internet quips. This is coping.

That said,]

you see what i mean? it's not looking good.

txt; @wrenched

[wrenchedup]

[ the saga of wrench not answering people's proposed questions continues. ] ooh, love a scavenger hunt. you think we get bonus points for extra creative kills?

[coolerjunpei]

[why won't any of you play in the bit with him]

knowing how these things go? probably. not from me, though. i don't run that fast, i'm like, 0.5 points on a good day.

text; un: henry

[vecna]

And what code name would you pick for yourself?

[coolerjunpei]

i don't really know, not too many people are getting into it. feels kind of stupid now...

[...but also,]

star maybe. or... pent. or just j.

un: harls; text;

[nutbuckets]

I already got a code name!

[coolerjunpei]

yeah? how good is it? like from 1 to 10.

text; un: Hob

[100more]

Dear God, why would we kill each other?

[That's very disturbing.]

[coolerjunpei]

here, let me try out the big bad mastermind routine.

[He switches to audio briefly for this, doing... a voice? It sounds like he's got a hand over his mouth on top of giving himself an extra rasp; his Mastermind Voice. As such:]

Good day all of you suckers, it's me, Scary Important Guy. There are like a hundred of you running around, but guess what! If a mere fifty-one of you die, the rest of you get to go home! In first class! You even get a keychain!

Chop chop, literally!

[anyway,]

as soon as we hear something like that? somebody out there's gonna take the bait.

text; un: keter

[gradenine]

that's no different from what im used to
killing each other i mean
nothing personal if we start facing each other like that tho

still think we're going to be some part of an experiment by a corporation
this shit's also common where im from

[coolerjunpei]

hey, if you guys start going at it, i'm crawling into a vent and hiding until you're all gone. no offense, i'll say my big "told you so" over your body.

corporations huh. so are you an evil suit or one of the underdogs?

@deku

[fullgauntlet]

I really hope we can avoid something like that. If we work together there shouldn't be problems...

[Look, even Izuku isn't that naive though. There's a real chance people are going to be scared and scared people do reckless things!! But... Boy golly, let him try to be positive.]

I'm wondering if there is an answer we're supposed to be finding here.

[coolerjunpei]

gotta be, otherwise what are we doing here?

[Ah, Junpei's one last iota of hope. Maybe killing each other is part of finding the answer! It has been before, so why not again.

But someone's going to die first before things get better. He is certain of this.]

we'd need a question first, though, right? besides "what the hell?"

un:balthier

[pirateprodigal]

[ This is obviously a weird death trap and Junpei gets points for calling it.

Too bad everything's made up and the points don't matter because they are in mortal peril. ]

I haven't the faintest idea why the rest of you are here, but clearly it was my inestimable popularity that earned my abduction.

Truly, I'm surprised we haven't had a known murder yet. Seems a bit slow off the mark.

[coolerjunpei]

[He will collect these points with pride nonetheless!!]

i get kidnapped enough to be considered a hot commodity, i guess. i'm broadly desirable.

and right? you get what i'm saying. holding hands and kumbaya-ing isn't going to last forever.

text, un: charmingflower

[selfloveable]

Oh, I definitely think we're here to get killed.



( wait, sarcasm doesn't work over text. damn. )

Do you even hear yourself???

[coolerjunpei]

hey, i said i'll be over the damn moon to be proven wrong. if nobody dies, you get to give *me* the first i told you so. i promise. it's all yours.

text, un: 013

[blattella]

Wrong answers only?

We're here for a music festival.


I don't really want to kill if folks don't bother me, though. Had enough of that. You have too, sounds of it.

[coolerjunpei]

yeah.

[But enough about that,]

so what kind of music festival? i've never been to any, too broke.

un: DONQUIXOT3

[icanfixer]

FOR WHAT REASON WOULD THEY SEEK TO INSPIRE SUCH HEINOUS INJUSTICE BETWEEN US?

UNLESS THERE ART THOSE WHOM HATH DONE WRONG, AND WE ART TO BE THEIR JUDGE, IN WHICH CASE 'TIS A FIXER'S DUTY TO DO JUSTICE UNTO THE NE'ER-DO-WELLS AND NO ONE ELSE'S!!!!!!!

EHM.

FOR WRONG ANSWERS, PERHAPS WE HATH BEEN INVITED HERE TO POPULATE THIS BARREN LAND!!!!! IT IS QUITE UNUSUAL THERE IS NO ONE BUT OURSELVES HERE...

[ why would anyone need a codename anyway. hers is fool proof. ]

[coolerjunpei]

[wowza]

are you a fixer? don't start doing justice to anybody yet.

don't start populating with anybody yet either..... that's the wildest wrong answer yet.

[He... hopes?? What if it's not the wrong answer, he didn't even consider--]

i'm rating that one a 6 out of 9.

un; midnightespresso | txt

[nerine]

Wrong answers only? Okay.

We're here to find... 💖Romance💖

And if we're here for a battle royale, who says you can't find love on the battlefield?

[coolerjunpei]

yeah this option sucks. i'm giving it 8 out of 10.

[No one is voting in his fun game so now the winner of the contest is the idea he likes the least, personally, oop--]

battlefield nothing, it's speed dating in the abandoned mall that's the real test.

un: ruby

[eyepoint]

Kidnapped for a reality tv show, maybe?
You know, like that show where people are taken to a deserted island and have to survive by playing games?
The winner becomes an instant celebrity!

[ he did say wrong answers only, so ]

[coolerjunpei]

6 out of 10, celebrity status isn't screwed up enough to be the endgame.

besides, this is more like that show where people had to live in the same house and compete to be the head over and over. unless you want to start catching rats to eat.

text; un:valkyrie_m

[galateaed]

y'know, it really ain't funny t' joke about killin' people like that!!
yer just gonna scare everyone >:(

'sides, i betcha anythin' it was ghosts that stuck us here
there's all kindsa stories online 'bout cursed trains an' haunted stations
don'tcha think this whole place's got that kinda vibe?

[coolerjunpei]

you really think i'm joking? you've got a rough surprise coming if i'm right.

it's definitely a ghost town if that's what you mean. i don't think we got ghost-napped. nobody's seen any.

text un: VioletRaven

[featherdaggers]

You volunteering to be the first one to die, that it?

[coolerjunpei]

why, you offering? no, though. i'm gonna hide in a vent until the rest of you finish whatever you're planning on doing.

text; un: susuwatari

[catmemes]

Intergalactic zoo exhibit. Our enclosure needed enrichment.

[coolerjunpei]

oh yeah that sucks, that's at least a 7 out of 10 on the suck scale. hey, though, are we the exhibit or the enrichment?

text: un:Broca

[broca]

[ What.

To most of this. To all of this really. There's a lot to respond to, but he's focusing on the very last part. ]

In case what?

[coolerjunpei]

in case.

[....okay,]

look, there's a decent chance we're here completely at random, right? that's possible. so the less the people in charge know about us, the better off we'll be. i just hope nobody put anything too personal in those survey questions.

text, un: vogel

[halbird]

[ resident "weenie who has killed people" emil sinclair from murder city does not like the murder suggestion, surprising no one. ]

Kill... each other.
Why would we do that? We're all in the same situation. Wouldn't it be easiest to work together so that we can figure out what's happening, and find out how to leave?

[ there's so many questions marks here because JUNPEI???? ]

Unless... Was that your "wrong answer" to your own question?

[coolerjunpei]

you'd think so, but that's assuming none of us are moles. or that we'll do the smart thing the first time instead of the 32nd time.

[Junpei, who has encouraged long-distance murder in a particularly stressful moment before: yeah only an idiot would do THAT]

it's an "i hope i'm wrong" answer. is that better?

text; un: tyro

[brothergoblin]

You used your real name in a message about code names?

[ Tyler doesn't know if that's funny or dumb... or both.

But, considering he's somewhat less paranoid: ]

What do you think actually brought us here? I don't think anything I come up with is going to be as entertaining as your answer

[coolerjunpei]

i didn't think the stupid questionnaire counted! sue me!

[It's funny. He's mostly made peace with it, he'll try to change it later maybe, but adding another tally to his "called out" counter...]

anyway, probably some guy with too much money and a lot of free time. he's filed for moral bankruptcy.